Just because you are older, doesn’t mean it’s over.
“I have a drawing that says, ‘Old people have them Sex. Says Joanne Price, a 77-year-old award-winning author, public speaker, and adult sex educator. “There is no expiration date on sexual activity, but a lot of people give it up because their bodies don’t function the way they did before. Instead, we can adapt, invent, recreate the exciting sex, and relax in it in a whole new way.”
What has changed?
When I was younger, my sex drive was hormones. As you get older, your hormone levels decrease.
For men, this means lower testosterone levels.
You might notice:
- Shorter orgasms
- Impaired ejaculation and less semen Production
- You need more stimulation to get and maintain an erection
- You need more time to get another erection after ejaculation
In women, Estrogen levels Decrease before and after menopause.
You might notice:
“Some people say, ‘Oh no, how can anyone want me with all this stuff Wrinkles? ‘Or’ I can’t have sex because my erections are unreliable, ‘”Price says.“ But sex can be better at this time in life than it ever was because we know ourselves. We know what we need and want in sex and life. “
Tip 1: Communicate
Communication is the one-size-fits-all sexual advice for everyone of any age.
“Older adults are not taught to talk about sex or even to acknowledge sexual pleasure and what they need,” says Price. “We didn’t learn to tell someone, I would really do Love If you do this instead. “
Whether you’ve been with your partner since dinner or for decades, no one can read your mind. The things that felt good when you were younger may not feel good now. Don’t Fake It: Learn loving ways to say what you need.
“Acknowledge where we are, mentally and physically,” suggests Price. Say, “I can’t hold this position because it hurts my knee, back, or neck” or “We need to have sex with a sex toy right now because I can’t get Orgasm without him.'”
Second tip: broaden your idea of good sex
Because a lack of hormones makes reaching orgasm more difficult as you get older, you may not cross the finish line the same way you did before. But you can still enjoy the ride.
“Sex is best when it is not goal-oriented. We can relax and enjoy the sensation.” Get rid of the expectation that sex should be intercourse. There are many other ways to give and receive pleasure and sensation – and possibly orgasms – as opposed to practicing this sexual act that you have always thought was “real sex”.
Tip 3: Try a sex toy
As you get older, sex toy is not just an enhancement; It could be the difference between orgasm or not. Price, who also reviews sex toys, says there are many great toys for both partners.
A good sex toy should be strong enough for your aging body, but it should increase the intensity rather than going from zero to 100 mph. It should also be:
- Able to work for a long time without losing its charge
- Easily rechargeable
- Made of body safe materials
- Comfortable to hold for long periods of time
- Skinny (Price says aging vaginas “aren’t welcome with a collar”)
Perhaps most importantly, your sex toy should be something that you can easily control through look or feel. “There’s nothing less exciting than fumbling with your glasses so you can see the controls of your sex toy,” says Price.
Tip 4: Try comfortable positions
You might not feel well anymore.
“Instead of“ trying a new position, ”I encourage people to find the position that is most comfortable for you – one that enables you to focus on the enjoyable sensation without any pains or pains, says Price. Comfort to you. “
Tip 5: Role-play with a partner or on your mind
Roleplay gives you the freedom to say anything, do anything, and be anyone. Prior communication with your partner prepares you for success. Start with questions like these:
- Should we play a fictional role every time? Or go out with one together?
- Name something that only stimulates you to think about, even if you never did in real life?
- If we tried to role-play as I just described it, what part would you like me to play and how would you like me to play it?
If your partner is not comfortable with this, you can always role-play in your mind.
“Our main sexual organ is brainYou can role-play in your imagination, Price says. It is not a betrayal of what you do with your partner; It’s an improvement over what you do with your partner. “
Tip 6: Consider age-appropriate open literature
If you consume younger erotica, you may be more depressed than excited. Consider pornography, magazines, books, or age-appropriate websites.
“Older adults are already aware of the limitations of their aging process, including aches and pains and the inability to do things the way they used to do,” Price says. “Celebrating age, not just acknowledging it, is a great way to stay sexy and enthusiastic as we get older.”